Re: Relationships – What Guru Sahib Thinks

Many of our recent posts have involved discussion about relationships and gender differentiations in our community. So on Thursday, when I drafted this post, I decided to read the hukamnama from Darbar Sahib Amritsar and see what Guru Granth Sahib Ji had to say that day.

For those of you who are novice to hukamnamas a hukamnama is a royal edict or decree. In the Sikh context, the hukamnama serves as a command from the Guru, a lesson in the Sikh perspective, and is something to reflect upon for (at least) the day. The hukamnama for that day was as follows:

Sorat(h) Mehalaa 5 Ghar 2 Dhupadhae

Ik oa(n)kaar Sathigur Prasaadh ||
Sagal banasapath mehi baisa(n)thar sagal dhoodhh mehi gheeaa ||
Ooch neech mehi joth samaanee ghatt ghatt maadhho jeeaa ||1||
Sa(n)thahu ghatt ghatt rehiaa samaahiou ||
Pooran poor rehiou sarab mehi jal thhal rameeaa aahiou ||1|| rehaao ||
Gun nidhhaan naanak jas gaavai sathigur bharam chukaaeiou ||
Sarab nivaasee sadhaa alaepaa sabh mehi rehiaa samaaeiou ||2||1||29||

Sorat’h, Fifth Mehla, Second House, Du-Paday:

One Universal Creator God. By The Grace Of The True Guru:
Fire is contained in all firewood, and butter is contained in all milk.
God’s Light is contained in the high and the low; the Lord is in the hearts of all beings. ||1||
O Saints, He is pervading and permeating each and every heart.
The Perfect Lord is completely permeating everyone, everywhere; He is diffused in the water and the land. ||1||Pause||
Nanak sings the Praises of the Lord, the treasure of excellence; the True Guru has dispelled his doubt.
The Lord is pervading everywhere, permeating all, and yet, He is unattached from all. ||2||1||29||

Initially, I read the hukamnama for its obvious meaning: the light of the Almighty is in every person. But as I tried to make sense of the hukamnama in relation to the ongoing discussion about relationships, it dawned on me that perhaps the Gurus message is deeper than just acknowledging the inherent God-light in our fellows. Ultimately, if we see the spark of God in every person with whom we interact, we would treat that individual differently.

I realize presenting this hukamnama is no solution to the problem of gender inequality/differentiation/bias, but I think that a lot of the time we lose sight of the point that our Guru demands that we treat others in a certain manner.

If we were given the change to meet and interact with Akal Purakh on a regular basis how would we behave? Would we deceive, abuse, or abandon Him? As a Sikh then, how must we treat each other (especially our companions) in light of the above hukamnama?


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9 Responses to “Re: Relationships – What Guru Sahib Thinks”

  1. Sundari says:

    It's so easy to forget the directive given to us by our Gurus and what truly can be obtained from reading the hukumnama. You're right, the hukumnama may not be the solution to all the problems we are observing in our community today, but it quite clearly delineates how we should look for those solutions.

    I know lots of people hate this comparison, but i truly believe that people have a hard time reconciling their cultural values from their religious values (is this something that can be reconciled?). Culturally, treating people differently based upon their gender/caste was accepted and the norm. Our religion says the opposite. So as individuals we have to respond to those disparities before we can move forward. And that's when we should refer to the hukumnama to provide us with the wisdom to do so…

  2. Sundari says:

    It’s so easy to forget the directive given to us by our Gurus and what truly can be obtained from reading the hukumnama. You’re right, the hukumnama may not be the solution to all the problems we are observing in our community today, but it quite clearly delineates how we should look for those solutions.

    I know lots of people hate this comparison, but i truly believe that people have a hard time reconciling their cultural values from their religious values (is this something that can be reconciled?). Culturally, treating people differently based upon their gender/caste was accepted and the norm. Our religion says the opposite. So as individuals we have to respond to those disparities before we can move forward. And that’s when we should refer to the hukumnama to provide us with the wisdom to do so…

  3. Phulkari says:

    I think the hukumnama you posted means we should aspire to treat each other as we would treat Wahe Guru Ji. Relationships are not easy, but Wahe Guru Ji resides in all of us … it's a matter of seeing it and acting on it. Would you slap Wahe Guru Ji, would you demean Wahe Guru Ji, would you dismiss Wahe Guru Ji's opinion, would you think Wahe Guru Ji is inherently self-centered and lazy all the time, and would you 2nd rate what Wahe Guru Ji is capable of doing? I would say no … then that means don’t treat each other that way.

  4. Phulkari says:

    I think the hukumnama you posted means we should aspire to treat each other as we would treat Wahe Guru Ji. Relationships are not easy, but Wahe Guru Ji resides in all of us … it’s a matter of seeing it and acting on it. Would you slap Wahe Guru Ji, would you demean Wahe Guru Ji, would you dismiss Wahe Guru Ji’s opinion, would you think Wahe Guru Ji is inherently self-centered and lazy all the time, and would you 2nd rate what Wahe Guru Ji is capable of doing? I would say no … then that means dont treat each other that way.

  5. Nicole says:

    Phulkari makes a good point about not treating each other badly and if we try to see the God in each other there may be more motivation not to act in such ways.

    As romanticized as this sounds, don't marry the person you can't see God within. It's much easier to get over the little things about someone if in the bigger picture of their soul you can see God.

  6. Nicole says:

    Phulkari makes a good point about not treating each other badly and if we try to see the God in each other there may be more motivation not to act in such ways.

    As romanticized as this sounds, don’t marry the person you can’t see God within. It’s much easier to get over the little things about someone if in the bigger picture of their soul you can see God.

  7. me says:

    Wow! Thank you Nicole for your words. They really got me thinking in terms of seeing what is 'important' in relationships. Thank you.

  8. me says:

    Wow! Thank you Nicole for your words. They really got me thinking in terms of seeing what is ‘important’ in relationships. Thank you.

  9. Relationships can play very vital role in the life of the people and family members. They always know the importance of the great relationships. People should do respect to their community members.